I have never been much of a writer so this blog will be my first attempt at self expression longer than a Facebook status. I enjoy speaking (just ask Nelson) but have always found it hard to get my thoughts on to paper. Maybe it is the ADD in me that won’t let me focus on one task that long. So here goes nothing… my first blog entry!
Monday will be our two year wedding anniversary! I can’t believe it has already been two years… the saying is true time flies when you are having fun. I truly enjoy the time we have had together but we both are ready for our little family to expand. We have been trying since last summer to get pregnant and unfortunately we haven’t had any luck. In July my doctor diagnosed me with Polycystic ovarian syndrome which causes me not to ovulate. Now I am no scientist but no ovulation = no baby L. My doctor recommended we start with Clomid which is the “aspirin of fertility drugs.” Clomid is supposed to be an ovulatory stimulant and help produce eggs…. only it didn’t. I have since taken 4 rounds of Clomid with zero results. It has been very hard to want something so bad and not be able to have it. It has been a battle with my self to be happy for those around me who are able to conceive and have children. I know God will provide and my time will come but until then I am working very hard on simply being happy for my friends instead of letting jealously rear her ugly head. I have been withdrawn and avoided some people simply because they were expecting a baby and my pregnancy test said negative. It has been something I have had to pray a lot about and promise to God and myself I will overcome. I must say since this year has started I am doing much better. I have had at least 6 friends/family announce they were expecting, and I only cried once.
So what happens from here? Well, on February 21st Nelson and I have a doctor appointment with a fertility specialist in Fort Worth. At Fort Worth Fertility… Where Miracles Begin their web site says. I hope our miracle can happen here. Until then I will simply enjoy the time I have with my husband and look forward to what the future will bring.
Not sure what you are talking about but you are a great writer! I never feel like I can express myself on paper, either...but I really enjoyed reading this. I am sorry to hear about your struggles, but it is encouraging to hear about your recent lifted spirit. This time of just you and Nelson is a gift and once you have children, you won't get it back. So enjoy it and embrace it - because God is in control. Thanks for sharing!
ReplyDeleteHey Tristine, It's Megan. :) I am sorry you are going through this. I offer hope in that I have two friends who both have POS as well, who both were able to get pregnant. It WILL happen for you, I know it will, just on His timing.
ReplyDeleteBTW, this is my blog. I'm going to follow you! :) I love blogging.